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6.05.2004from the heart
it's late, and i'm tired, and i don't really feel like blogging right now, but i have to.
i was originally going to write about how cool it was that i was at my friends house here in connecticut, and when i opened up her refrigerator i saw a bottle of yuengling lager (which you can't buy in connecticut) greeting me. but, i dont feel like i can waste my time with that right now. one of my best friend's mothers just died. she had cancer for a while, which had not been getting any better, and i guess everyone knew that it was just a matter of time. i suppose, though, that for some reason i refused to really believe that she wouldn't get better, and my friend and his family would be spared this pain. it's not right. nobody should have to lose their mother so early. personally, i don't know how to react. i want to be there for my friend, so i am doing everything possible to make it down to philadelphia this week. but, i haven't had to deal with death very often in my life. my dog, scruffy, died when i was 5. there was my great great aunt mina who died when i was 14. that's pretty much it. so, other than those two situations, my experience with consoling either myself or other people is limited. i'm afraid to say anything, because i don't know if it will be more painful to bring up memories of his mother, or if it will be helpful to think about the happiness she brought to other people. contrarily, if i don't say anything, then i think that it will seem as if i am not being supportive, and that's the last thing i want. i feel helpless. it's awful. so, what i can say is this: his family is made up of wonderful people. they are very loving and generous. if the only complaint that you can have about your family is that they bother you too much because they love you and care about you and worry about you, then you have a great family. all of us who are friends with him know this already. i wish i knew what else to say. i'll just finish up by saying that all my love goes out to his family. they are some of the best people anyone could ever hope to meet. and to all of the families of the people i know (and don't know) who read this silly waste of time, i wish you the best also. some of you i probably haven't spoken to in some time, but i surely think about you all often... |
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