hi, i'm a dork. you know this by now. if, somehow, this fact has escaped you until now, i think the addition of the hartford whaler photos should make it uncomfortably obvious.

really, i don't even know why i named my blog what i did, or what it has to do with the whalers. in fact, this blog has extremely little or no connection at all with the whalers, other than the blog belonging to me and my continuing fantasy that the whalers will make a grand return to the nhl.

i'd like to say that this blog has meaning and purpose, that there is a common theme developing here. truthfully, the only theme seems to be that i'm pretty messed up. hey, and that's cool with me. it sure beats the hell out of being boring.

anyway, time to change the topic completely.

i went to the ear, nose, and throat doctor today. i've had a perpetual cold all my life, and lately the right side of my throat hasn't felt too awesome. i was expecting the doctor to tell me that my throat was in really bad shape, and to ask me if i had, at any point in time, tried to swallow an exacto knife (which i haven't, just for the record).

instead, it was his comment about my ears that cracked me up the most. especially because i warned him ahead of time that when i was a child my pediatrician commented in amazement about the volume of wax in my ears. gross, i know...

i don't think the doctor believed me. he looked into my ears and started sucking out the wax with some type of vacuum thingy. he got a bunch out and was like, "wow, it just keeps coming!" soon after, he pulled the hose out of my ear and shut the machine off.

"it's like trying to suck out cement," he commented.

we had a good laugh about it, then he told me to put baby oil in my ears, and gave me a shitload of allergy medication. so, i'm actually breathing through my nose right now. it's a very odd experience. it's been a long time since i haven't had a stuffy nose.

now i'm hoping that the yankees will go see a proctologist. someone needs to take those bats out of their asses so they can start hitting the damn baseball.